Weekly Insights
What church leaders need to know about young parents and the difficulties of child rearing
Stat of the Day:
92% of parents ages 18-39 like it when people acknowledge how hard it is to be a parent (YPulse, 2023)
Why It Matters:
The importance of mental health is a widely-discussed topic among Gen Z and Millennials. As many of these young people become parents and start dealing with the particular trials and travails of raising children of their own, they are discovering a whole new world of joy, excitement, anxiety, and frustration, all wrapped up in one (or more) tiny little bundle(s). Starting their parenting journeys with Brené Brown’s famous “The Power of Vulnerability” TED Talk deep in their subconscious and conscious minds (the video has been viewed over 60 million times), these young people want to be open about their struggles with others, especially relatives and friends.
As Gen Z and Millennial parents face major hurdles around affordable childcare and often-limited parental leave policies in the workplace, their hardships in child-rearing are not merely emotional and psychological—they are economic and logistical as well. The rapid transition to remote work during the pandemic exacerbated a number of the difficulties faced by working parents, especially for working moms. Talking about these struggles openly, therefore, is both a way of establishing connections and practicing empathy for these generations. Perhaps even more importantly, open discussion of the problems young parents are facing may be an invitation to pursue creative solutions—establishing better childcare options, supporting more than bare-minimum parental leave policies, and more.
What Can We Do?
As church leaders and as communities of faith, there is much we can do to support young parents as they navigate the changes and struggles of raising families. As communities with deep relationship networks, we may be able to help struggling parents who could use more childcare support, especially for single parents and families where both parents work. As we discern what kinds of support and care are needed or desired, listening is the key. Many of the struggles new parents face are the same between generations—lack of sleep, adjusting to new rhythms of life, communication between parental figures, etc. But many other challenges are wholly new. For example, when should I/we introduce iPads or smart devices? Should I allow my child’s photo to be posted on social media? How do I raise my child with hope when the climate crisis threatens their future?
Some parents may want to share their struggles because they’re looking for solutions, but many others may simply share because they believe that vulnerability and open dialogue are key to alleviating stress and managing their anxiety. The only way to tell the difference is by active listening, especially nonjudgmental listening. And who knows—if we try to listen better and support young parents as they navigate their changed lives with children, they might just come knocking the next time they need some straightforward advice from their elders.
Try It:
Ask the young parents in your community about the struggles they’re facing as they adjust to parenthood and navigate its joys and challenges. Try to discern what kind of support they might be looking for when they share and consider what the church community might be able to do to provide spiritual, emotional, or logistical support.