Weekly Insights
What church leaders need to know about young people and family gatherings this holiday season.
Stat of the Day:
more than one in four American adults “expect managing family dynamics to negatively impact their well-being this holiday season” (Fortune: Well)
Changing Holiday Plans:
As young people continue to pioneer mental health as a lifestyle priority, they’re taking a second look at many of the family expectations and traditions that bring stress into their lives. Many Millennials are therefore deciding to not go home at all this holiday season, in large part to protect their mental health. While these dynamics may also be at play for Gen Z young adults, many in this generation can’t even afford the travel, in part because of their ballooning debt load and student loan payments.
Add in climate change and the high level of carbon emissions from air travel, and it becomes clearer why many people are opting to stay local and skip the large family reunions.
Why it Matters:
As young people strike out on their own, independent from their families of origin, there is always a great deal of change. These changes affect nuclear families and their internal dynamics just as they affect congregational life—especially when youth group members go off to college and don’t/rarely return home. Many churches this season will be supporting parents and elderly congregants who are sad and grieving not necessarily because of a traumatic death, but simply because their hallowed family traditions are being thrown out of sync as they grapple with the decisions of the adults they’ve been rearing for decades. Churches may also have to adjust their plans and congregational traditions when core congregants are traveling to visit their children who are either unable or unwilling to make the trip back home.
Opportunities for Congregational Change:
While these personal and familial changes may be tough on our congregants, there are many opportunities for growth in response to these new patterns of life. Church leaders can equip their congregants with solid grief and mourning practices for even the mundane changes in life, thereby supporting them with a strong foundation they can rely on when traumatic or major grief events come along. Furthermore, the absence of key congregants (e.g., the veteran Christmas Pageant organizer and Director, or the leading chef who always prepared the Thanksgiving Feast for the homeless) creates space within the congregation for other people with different skill sets to exercise their expertise. If no one fills the gap for a historic local tradition, maybe it’s time for something new! Church leaders who can help their congregations through processes open to change in small things will create stronger, more resilient communities that can adjust to big changes however they comes along.